First of all I have decided to hate all those who insist on attaching "gate" to any scandal - Porngate, coalgate (some marketing executives must be moaning) etc.
Coming to the topic, let us consider something in the very recent past. Twice, Sri Lanka held the fate of India's entry into the finals of cricket tournaments, and we were let down, so to say both times. As an interesting sideline in both series Kohli put up heroic performances, to no avail in the larger scenario. Let us look at the political scenario. India has voted in favour of the US resolution condemning Sri Lanka, and as I had expected China opposed it. What needs to be noted is that in its pursuit of power China has been seen to support not-so-palatable regimes and practices, be it in Africa or elsewhere.
If there were human rights abuses in Sri Lanka they need to be condemned, and strongly so. However how advisable was it to vote publicly? India could very well have given a private dressing down. But, no, as we have seen the present UPA government has consistently been at the receiving end from its partners and in this case it was the DMK. Having failed miserably in the last assembly elections the DMK is trying to play to the gallery to the hilt. The Congress also does not want to be seen as anti-Tamil.
China has this policy called String of Pearls. More information can be obtained from here, here and here. From the looks of it, India does seem to be doing something to counter China. The Indian Peace Keeping Force (IPKF) in Sri Lanka was not exactly a success. Unless I am mistaken this was one of the main reasons why Rajiv Gandhi was assassinated. So how exactly are we trying to build goodwill in Lanka? I do not know. Whenever Sri Lanka is in the news it is either because the Lankan navy has fired at or detained Indian fishermen or because of our Tamilian parties crying themselves hoarse about injustice to their brethren across the Palk Strait. We must focus more on the positives and get the Lankans to appreciate our just demands rather than act like a big brother. The IDSA article, a link to which is given above specifically focuses on the importance of diplomacy.
Much has been written of late how today influence is being increasingly wielded by economic rather than military means. China is building the Gwadar port in Pakistan. India can similarly work with Bangladesh (as it already is I believe) to link its north east to other parts via sea and road. It should continue its work in Iran, whether it be the Iran-Pakistan-India gas pipeline or working with Iran on its ports to ensure a supply route to Afghanistan in the event Pakistan turns (further) hostile. Goodwill must be the primary means by which India should strive to first counter China. This would rather akin to the ancient Indian medicinal science of Ayurveda which focuses on prevention as importantly if not more than on cure. Charm and win over potential allies of China denying them any hostile space there. Remember the saying, the enemy of my enemy is my friend. India does not need to create the negative emotion of hostility which is in fact more difficult. I believe we are generally not perceived to be as aggressive (in a negative way) as China. Leverage this and counter those who wish us ill.
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